Sex & Relationships: Slow Sex (OM)
I’m beginning to recommend Slow Sex by Nicole Daedone and Orgasmic Meditation (OM) as a suggested “active approach” for couples in search of new desire and arousal. Apart from the technique of OM, and the larger practice of Slow Sex, one of my favorite ideas from the book is that sex is an art, so we cannot […]
Relationship Therapy: How Long Will It Take?
Couples seeking relationship and couples therapy in Seattle sometimes ask a particular question when we set up a first appointment on the phone: “How long will couples therapy take?” I’d like to discuss some common reasons for that question, and then offer a different take on it. The Common Reasons The usual curiosity behind that […]
Poly Couples Going Mainstream
Much has been published in the last 15 years about polyamory, – or the more familiar “poly”, in the public discourse. Fortunately, very early in my couples practice, I began to work with poly couples clients who had standing (and evolving) agreements about how (or whether )they would practice sexual, emotional, non-exclusive/non-monogamous relationships. A Brief […]
Some Thoughts On Agreements
My relationship and couples clients know that I usually explore how they “agree”. As a description of therapy, ‘finding agreements’ may sound rudimentary or simplistic. It may be confused with mediation and negotiation. One party might think that finding agreement means somebody’s got to sell themselves out. I believe the truth is very different. Helping […]
The Interactive Therapist
Increasingly, clients calling about beginning therapy say they are looking for a therapist who is “active” or “interactive”. This usually means that the client wants the therapist to speak openly and even frequently, to disclose how the client and his or her situation(s) are viewed. Recommending actions to take, specific techniques and “tools” to use […]